Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Anxiety

I think that part of what's been happening with all these miscarriages, is that I'm stuck in some kind of Catch-22.

I have a condition that causes pain and inflammation if I get stressed. The stress could be caused by foods that I'm sensitive to, lack of sleep or just general anxiety and stress.

Here's the kicker: these miscarriages cause a lot of stress, which in turn causes inflammation. According to my RE, at least part of my problem staying pregnant is inflammation. In other words, the more I stress my body - physically and mentally - to have this baby, the more I undermine my chances.

I've been spending the last couple of months trying to get it under control. I've cut out all foods that cause even a slight reaction, have been taking melatonin and going to be early to ensure good sleep and have been trying to reduce my mental stress.

It's that last one that is kicking me in the ass just now. I've been having a flair up for the last few days - not fun - and it's totally attributable to mental stress.

I want so badly to get this under control before January comes and we try again, but it seems that just thinking about it is causing enough anxiety to stress me out. Ugh.

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